Having It All Page 6

  He stilled her with a tug at the back of her sweater. And hoped to hell that he wasn’t about to ruin an important friendship. “Not takeout. What if I want to heat things up with you?”

  “Very funny.” Annabeth tried to twitch her sweater from his grip.

  Josh just grabbed for the ends of the sash and used it to inch her closer. “I’m not joking.”

  “No.” The answer was fast, automatic. Then she held still for a beat, as if actually thinking about it, before shaking her head. “We can’t. It would be a bad idea. You know that.”

  “Why?” He held up a palm to forestall another auto response. “Don’t mention your job. Or Summer, or Riley, or the rest of the guys. Frankly, I’m tired of everyone else’s feelings counting more than ours.”

  “Majority rules?” she offered with a weak, tight smile.

  “Nope.” Josh widened his stance. Drew her in to lean between his thighs. So close that flecks of black and gold were visible in the pools of her eyes. Annabeth was forced to slap her palms onto his chest to maintain some air between them. “Right here, right now, this isn’t about anyone but you and me. Tell my why we’d be bad together.”

  They stood there, in an almost-embrace, for enough long breaths for Josh to notice the rumble of the ice machine cranking up. More than long enough for him to wonder if he’d read her wrong all those times he thought they’d flirted right to the edge of doing something about it.

  Reading words was enough of a shit show for him. What made him think he could read a woman, which was infinitely harder?

  Finally, just as Josh started to let the sash slip through his fingers, Annabeth said, “We wouldn’t work because we like each other so much.”

  Oh yeah—he clearly did not understand women at all. “What the hell? That’s the first hurdle most people have to jump to get to dating.”

  “You don’t date, Josh. You’re a player.” She didn’t throw the accusation at him like a dirty word. Just as an emotionless fact. Like noting that snowflakes were now drifting sideways past the kitchen window. “You flirt and tease and flatter women into bed and good times.”

  Had she gotten mixed up on the question? Was she listing reasons why they should date? “I’m still not seeing the problem, Annabeth.”

  “Yes, you do. You know as well as I do that dating could spiral into badness. Having just a fling would be even worse. Sure, we’d explode between the sheets. And then…we’d implode.”

  Shit. Now he saw the problem. And it had zero to do with their friends or her job. “You think I’m going to hurt you. That it’ll be too good between us, and then I’ll do something stupid to mess it up.”

  “Let’s say seventy percent that—given your reputation—and thirty percent a chance that I’m the one who messes everything up. I’m not the poster child for relationships either.”

  “The real issue isn’t that we’d be bad together. It’s that we’d be too good. Too good to easily walk away from.”

  Nodding slowly, eyes darting downward, she murmured, “Yes.”

  That one word slayed him. Almost as much as the faint tremble Josh felt run through her body. To soothe her, he anchored his hand at the back of Annabeth’s neck and stroked his thumb up and down her cheekbone.

  Well, if he’d caused this roadblock, Josh sure as hell could ram through it. “You know why I’ve got that reputation as a player? It’s because it’s true. I’ve never lied about it. Never given a woman false hope. Never made a promise I didn’t keep. But most of all? I never made an effort. Not until today.”

  In a perfectly diagonal smirk, her right eyebrow shot up as the left side of her mouth curved down. “You fixing my stove was supposed to be the effort?”

  “Of course not.” And it was more than a little insulting that she thought it had been a move. Josh dropped his hand back down to her waist. “We’re friends. There’s no strings attached to the house call for the stove. You know me better than that.”

  Annabeth bit her lower lip. Her plump, pink, luscious lip. “Sorry. That was unfair.”

  “Me being honest with you about wanting to change the status quo, forcing us to be honest with each other. That was the effort.”

  “Effort for both of us,” she reminded him. Fairly. Because Annabeth had been honest about her level of want for him, too. In a way they’d never, ever discussed before.

  “Look, I haven’t done this”—he wagged a finger back and forth in the small pocket of air between them—“before. I like skimming the surface, playing the field. But I don’t want to play around with you, Annabeth.” Josh almost paused to take a deep breath. Then he realized he didn’t need one. Didn’t need to steel himself to keep going. “I want to get serious. I want to give it a try. Actually dating. Like you said, we’re friends already. That’s the first step. I just want to take the next one with you.”

  “That’s an enticing offer.” Her fingers moved across his chest, tracing the top edge of the lettering that spelled out Capitol Grilled on his sweatshirt in red script. “And I’ll pay your honesty back with my own. I’ve wondered about this, about what it would be like with you, for years. You’re so much fun, Josh.”

  Huh. Why did that feel like an insult? Like Annabeth was writing on the toilet stall door, For a good time, call Josh Hardwick? “Fair warning—I don’t smile all the time. Real life does get to me, just like everyone else.”

  “No, it was a compliment.” Now she patted right over his heart, as if she’d noticed the edge to his tone. “I get focused, or sometimes I get in a rut. I don’t lift my head up often enough to laugh and enjoy like you do. I love that you’re this burst of fun and lightness. Your loyalty to the guys is awe-inspiring. Your patience working with at-risk youth is amazing. And if you let that smile shield of yours slip, I bet I’d like what’s behind it. I want to find out.”

  That all sounded good.

  But…Annabeth didn’t lean any closer. Didn’t start kissing him.

  Clearly, Josh hadn’t convinced her. Not enough. So he decided to throw a Hail Mary. Toss the ball from half-court and hope for the best.

  God, he couldn’t believe he was saying the words even as they fell from his lips. “How about we take sex off the table?”

  “The table? Shouldn’t we start in a bed?”

  Normally, Annabeth’s utterly literal interpretation of the world amused Josh. This morning? It was just another damned speed bump in this conversation. “You’re missing my point. I’m saying how about no sex? We take it slow. Old-fashioned-style dating. To reduce the risk of my apparently inevitable fuckup.”

  She backpedaled out of his arms. Kept going until her back met the refrigerator. Then Annabeth’s jaw slowly dropped. “You’d give up sex?”

  With a snort, Josh said, “Not forever. But, yeah. For you. To be with you.” He moved forward to get right in front of her again. Proximity—to him—seemed to throw her off-balance.

  “You’ve slept with half the women in D.C.” It was spit out like an accusation.

  More like two-thirds, he thought smugly. “And I could keep working my way through the other half. But I’ve been there and done that. I can get sex, Annabeth. I finally want something more. I want you.”

  Her hand slowly fluttered up to her chest. Then the other one joined it. The whole time, her eyes never left his. “That’s a powerful proposition.”

  Only if it worked. Josh brought his own hands up to hold hers in place over his heart. “I mean it. Every word.”

  “It’s powerful, and a little off-kilter. Irresistible, though. Just like you.” Annabeth licked her dusky lips and cocked her head. “Also? That’s probably the most romantic thing that’s ever been said to me.”

  It always felt good to get the first point on the scoreboard. But he also wanted to make sure the rules were clear. “Ah, to clarify, I do want to have sex with you. I’m just willing to wait.”

  “I heard you. That’s what’s so romantic.” And the smile she gave him was one he’d never seen before.
There was a layer of tenderness cloaking the ever-present sexiness.

  It was the most beautiful smile she’d ever aimed at him.

  “Is that a yes?” he asked, both cautious and impatient as hell to get this thing buttoned up.

  “Yes, Josh. I agree to the not-sleeping-with-you terms of our dating. Although, just to clarify, I do want to have sex with you, too.”

  “See? We’re already friends, and we both want to jump into bed. I’m telling you, we’ve got this dating thing nailed down.”

  The coffeemaker beeped as Annabeth laughed. She moved to the cupboard and pulled down two mugs.

  Josh, on the other hand, didn’t feel like laughing. Making the offer had been simple. Now that she’d taken him up on it?

  He didn’t know how the hell he’d survive the next few…days? Weeks? Holy hell, what if it was months? Panic balled in his gut.

  What had he done?

  “Ah, Annabeth? Maybe we should lay down some more ground rules. A timeline…”

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  Four more people crowded onto the elevator in the Watergate Hotel. Everyone readjusting to make room pushed Annabeth tight against Josh. His arm shot around her waist to anchor her even closer. If they weren’t still wearing parkas, hotel security would probably ask them to leave for standing that close.

  Suspicion prickled across her brain in a test pattern of wariness.

  “I’m not having sex with you tonight,” Annabeth announced as she poked her hat down over her forehead.

  It was a red newsboy cap trimmed in black leather that Summer had insisted she wear “for marketing purposes.” Usually, wearing the boutique’s clothes around town made Annabeth nervous, as they were miles out of her price range. But this was just a hat. A sassy hat. A girl needed a little extra pizzazz for a first date.

  Josh sucked a sharp, short breath between his teeth. His palm jerked against her belly. “Jesus. I do have a reputation in this town. Could you keep your voice down? Maybe not bring that up every five minutes?”

  “It felt like it needed to be restated. Because…you brought me to a hotel. For our first official date.”

  “Unless you’re meeting a prostitute, hotels don’t have to just be about sex.”

  Gasping, Annabeth cranked her neck around. “Did you just infer to this whole elevator that I’m a prostitute?”

  “Obviously not,” he replied coolly. “Since you just stated to this whole elevator that you’re not having sex with me.”

  The Indian man next to them in a suit and a bright blue turban pointedly angled his face away from them. The family with two teens all snickered. The pearl-clutching trio of older women in smart suits all huffed and sniffed. Annabeth wasn’t sure which camp she fit best in herself.

  “It just seems like a weird choice,” she muttered.

  “Seems like a weird choice for you to judge the content of the date before you’ve even tried it.” Josh’s pleasant expression didn’t change. But his words were forced out between gritted teeth.

  Whoops. “Sorry.”

  She’d never edited herself when talking to Josh. Never worried about being sensitive to his ego. But it took only two seconds of hindsight to realize she never, ever would’ve spoken like that to any other first date. Wouldn’t have second-guessed the evening to his face before they’d even taken their coats off.

  Clearly, the transition from a friendship to dating would require an actual shift in mind-set. Something Annabeth could admit she should have thought of at, oh, any point over the five days since they’d agreed to give this a whirl.

  “Give me a little credit.” Josh’s warm breath fluttered across her ear. “A little room to work. We’ve been friends for years, remember? I know enough to figure out how to show you a good time.”

  Oh, this could be interesting. “What do you think you know about me?”

  “You love winter.”

  Luckily, the noise of the older women disembarking covered most of Annabeth’s guffaw. He’d have to make more of an effort than that to impress her. Frankly, that was an amateur-hour fact to offer up. “It’s the week between Thanksgiving and December kicking off. Everyone’s in a wintry mood. Holiday lights are sparkly, we’re not sick of bundling up yet, and the snow’s still white and not blackened by road dust.”

  Tightening his arms around her, Josh said, “I walked you to your car at the end of a shift a few years ago. It started to snow. You stopped walking, even though it was two in the morning. Held out your hands to watch the flakes land on them. Then you threw your arms out to the sides, spun slowly, and sort of whispered, ‘I love winter.’”

  That was one heck of a specific memory. “I’m impressed. Actually, I’m shocked. How on earth did you remember that?”

  “I’ve been watching you more closely than you realized for a long time now. Shit, wait, did that sound creepy?”

  “A little. But in context, it’s really lovely.” Knee-weakening levels of lovely. Which she honestly hadn’t expected from Josh. The least Annabeth could do was return the favor. “I watched you, too. I know things about you.”

  “Like what?”

  “I know that when you guys were all in high school together, Knox was the skinny nerd. That you toughened him up, taught him how to work out, and once he’d buffed up a bit, taught him how to get a girl.”

  “Shhhh. Until his engagement this summer, Knox took great pride in his status as the biggest man-whore on the Eastern Seaboard. I think he still wants people to know that reputation existed. It’s good business-wise to combat the whole boring geek thing he has going as the head of his company.”

  The doors opened again, letting out the man in the turban. Pity. That left more than enough room for Annabeth not to crowd up against Josh anymore. And given their no-sex pact, it didn’t seem right to be plastered against him.

  She pulled away to turn and face him. “I’m not outing him. I’m saying that I know you basically did a reverse Cinderella on him. That you were pivotal in helping Knox discover who he really was meant to be. The thing is? You still look out for him and help him.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I watched you all sit in the POV bar for years. You and Knox were always, always on the prowl. And yet you always, always stood back and let him choose first. Twelve years later, and you still wait at his elbow for Knox to figure out which pretty woman he can get.”

  Josh ducked his head. Tugged his light blue knit cap lower on his forehead. “The man’s a multimillionaire. He’s almost as ripped as I am. Knox doesn’t need my help.”

  “But you do it anyway. You’re the mentor, hanging back to encourage him, to make things easier. Because you want him to succeed. Because you still want to do whatever you can to build his confidence.”

  As the doors opened again, Josh took her hand and pulled her out. Head close, he said, “You can’t ever say anything like that to Knox. He doesn’t need to know.”

  “That you’re a generous, amazing friend?”

  Annabeth gasped as cold air whipped across her cheeks. They were on the roof.

  “Well…you can say that.” Josh winked. Then he wrapped her hand around his arm and led her farther into the bar. “Welcome to the Top of the Gate. Or, as they call it for the next few weeks, Top of the Skate.”

  The rooftop bar had a view across the Potomac to the twinkling lights of Georgetown and Virginia. Flames flickered in the metal cages of tall heaters spread between the tables. Wedged between the railing and the outer curve of the bar was a long, skinny rectangle of ice, with couples skating in a loop.

  “This is amazing. Omigosh, that’s the Kennedy Center next to us.”

  “You worked at night so much, I figured you probably missed out on the fun of the bar scene. We can skate, sip some warm cocktails under a blanket by the fire pit, and just appreciate what a cool place we live in.” Their meandering path stopped at the counter where skates were dispensed.

  As they laced them up, Annabeth beamed at Josh. “I lov
e it.”

  “There you go again, judging this date before it really kicks in…” he complained in an exaggerated whine.

  Geez, the man was adorable. “I love that you thought of something out of the box for us to do, whether it works or not. How’s that?”

  “Acceptable.”

  Holding gloved hands, they clomped onto the rink. Took a lap, grinning at each other with the fun of it, then stopped at the edge with its drop fourteen floors to the dark river below.

  “I figure your boutique’s right over there,” Josh said, pointing right with two fingers angled into a vee.

  Guilt cut into her more sharply than the November wind. Her hands tightened on the railing. “I should be working. There’s a rejuggle of inventory to finish now that Black Friday madness is behind us. I don’t know what I was thinking, agreeing to go out on a Tuesday.”

  “Uh, it’s after nine. You shouldn’t be working, no matter what’s left to do.”

  It wasn’t that cut and dried. Especially since Annabeth was still proving herself at her new job. To herself first and then to her boss. “Summer expects me to finish my to-do list.”

  Josh pushed her words away with his hand. “I guarantee that Summer doesn’t expect you to burn the midnight oil. She’s well aware that sleep is vital. If it makes you feel better to compare ‘shoulds’? My alarm goes off at four a.m. I ‘should’ be in bed.”

  Her head whipped to the side. Josh was grinning like he’d gotten away with breaking curfew. Except they weren’t kids. His food truck started serving at six every morning. After he picked up fresh produce and prepped everything. He’d be miserable and dragging tomorrow because of her. Because she’d refused to leave work at five like a normal person to go out with him.

  “That makes me feel even more guilty.”

  Josh tugged at the loose braid hanging down the front of her black parka. “Annabeth, you need to get your head in this date. You’re talking to me like we’re friends.”